Why DFS is the best store ever
by ecce-LESLIE
Summary: Naruto needs a new sofa, but when he takes a trip to DFS gets more than he bargained for. Oneshot, rated M, lemon, narusasu.


Author's Note: Oh dear god This is our first one shot, and our first lemon. Most of it was written by Weez actually. For those who don't know, DFS is a furniture store in the UK that sells mostly sofas. Anyway on with the story, and please review!

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It was time for a new sofa. Naruto had been eating been eating a lot of ramen that summer's day, and was fat and tired. When he sat down he had intended to collapse on his sofa, but, unexpectedly, his trusty sofa collapsed on him. Naruto fell off it and, by pure coincidence, and not fate, (Naruto didn't do fate), landed on the TVs remote control. The TV flickered on.

"THE DFS CHRISTMAS SALE IS NOW ON," boomed an advertisement. "ONLY £382.50! ORDER IN STORE NOW AND YOUR SOFA WILL ARRIVE JUST IN TIME FOR CHRISTMAS!" Naruto's ears pricked up. "HURRY, SALE ENDS THURSDAY!" Most normal people would ignore the advertisement, but we're talking about Naruto here. He had to get one of those sofas. NOW. He had, of course, spent most of his money on the cause of his beloved sofa's demise. But Naruto had a solution for that.

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"Sasuke, can I borrow some money?"

"No."

"But-" Naruto protested

"No."

"Why not?"  
"Listen, dobe, I already lent thirty eight quid which you spent on ramen, and I still haven't got my money back. Get a job."

"But you see, teme, my sofa collapsed yesterday, and if I don't get the enough money for a new one the SALE WILL END!"

"Too bad, dobe," Sasuke said, walking away, chuckling to himself about something or other. How odd.

Naruto grumbled to himself, but then he spotted that Sasuke had conveniently (and NOT by fate) dropped some money. After an examination he discovered it was the exact amount of money needed for the perfect sofa. Sasuke had also dropped a bus ticket to DFS. Naruto was on a one-way-trip to buying the sofa of his dreams, BELIEVE IT!

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There they were. The great doors of DFS. They opened suggestively to reveal a sign implying that he had to go deep with the store to discover his true sofa. "WELCOME TO DFS" it read. Naruto wandered vaguely what DFS actually stood for. He began to wander the store, searching for an orange sofa that would hold his weight after much ramen consumption. He wandered through the massive forest of furniture, past chair after chair, He looked around and began to think that everything was looking awfully similar to where he had started, but the entrance was nowhere in sight. "KAMI-SAMA, WHERE THE HELL AM I!!?"

"Can I help you Sir?" asked a polite voice from behind him. He whirled around to come face-to-face with a DFS employee. Hold on, this one looked rather familiar. He had a scowl on his face, pale skin, spiky dark hair, and considerably wider than usual coal black eyes. Dear God, Sasuke was working in DFS.

"Sasuke-teme? YOU work in DFS?!"

"Tsk, who says I work here? Idiot."

"Well the name-tag DOES suggest that you sell sofas for profit…"

"Whatever, dobe. Do you need help or what?" he offered in businesslike way.

"Well. We-e-e-ell. How the tables have turned. The great Sasuke Uchiha offering assistance to the "dead last" Naru-"

"Shut it, dobe," Sasuke hissed, "or I'll shove as sofa so far up your fecking arse that you'll need a carpenter to remove it!"

Naruto now knew what DFS stood for. Don't Fuck with Sasuke.

"Well anyway, Sasuke, I need your help finding the brightest orange sofa you have and make it snappy!"

"Don't push your luck, usuratonkachi," growled a thoroughly irritated Sasuke.

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It only took about five minutes for Sasuke to take him to a small but stylish orange sofa, located at the very back of the store. He was good at this job, Naruto observed. On spur of the moment, he jumped onto the sofa happily, pulling Sasuke down with him. Sasuke was caught off guard, and landed in a rather compromising position.

"Gerrof, teme," ordered a flustered Naruto.

"Well you were the one who dragged me into this."

"Hey Sasuke, are you BLUSHING?"

"Hn. I could ask you the same."

"You gonna get off anytime soon?"

"The only "getting off" I'll be doing anytime soon is with you, dobe."

"wha...?" began the slightly confused, but secretly delighted ninja

"You heard me, Dobe-chan..." Sasuke began to lean into Naruto. Naruto stayed frozen, unsure of what to do. Sasuke was looming ever closer, until he was mere millimetres away and Naruto could feel his hot breath mingling with the one above him, sending chills down his spine. Finally Sasuke bridged the gap between their lips. Naruto was shocked at first, well, it wasn't everyday that your rival/friend started kissing you in the middle of a furniture store, but soon began to kiss back as his eyes slid tightly shut.

Naruto could feel Sasuke's hand moving down, but then he suddenly had a thought "_dobe-CHAN, HE THINKS I'M THE GIRL!!... Well, WE'LL see about that!_" Somehow, while Sasuke was preoccupied, Naruto managed to roll them over, so now he was on top of a rather irritated but panting Uchiha.

Naruto smirked victoriously and whispered; "You know, Sasu-chan, you look pretty sexy in that uniform, but I think you would look much, much better without it," and with that Naruto began to nibble and tease his way down to Sasuke's collarbone, before lightly biting down on the soft, salty skin.

A groan left the raven's lips as Naruto unfastened each of Sasuke's buttons at an excruciatingly slow pace, while tracing ghost like touches down his chest, leaving goose bumps in its wake, _"DAMN, when the heck did Naruto learn to do that?The sneaky idiot." _Naruto smirked again as he began to descend on the toned stomach beneath him, pausing to breath tantalisingly above the area, enjoying the annoyed grunts he was receiving from the usually stoic boy below him, before finally placing his lips down and moving his hands to the Uchiha's nipples, drinking in the moans of pleasure that Sasuke failed to control. He began to move lower and lower, dipping his tongue into the raven's navel and swirling it around. Finally, after much detouring, Naruto made it to the belt that was locking away what the blond was really after.

He managed to take the belt off, but he wasn't done with it, ohhhh nooo, Naruto had a better use for it, so whilst the Uchiha was distracted in his near euphoric state, Naruto slowly slipped up wards and skillfully looped the strip of leather around Sasuke's hands, tightened it, and then fastened it to the leg of a heavy bed next to them. Naruto wondered why they had chosen the sofa over it, but now was not the time for questions. Before the unsuspecting teme had realised, Naruto had regained his former position, and was already sliding down Sasuke's shorts, leaving him with a rather graphic view of his lower quarters.

WHY had Naruto stopped thought an pouting inner Uchiha, as he opened his eyes to send his annoyed feelings to wards the blond dobe, but stopped when he saw the rather erotic sight before him. Naruto was smirking with half lidded eyes, he had already taken off his sweater and was in the middle of lifting up the black shirt underneath, giving Sasuke a full view of his lean tanned stomach and chest, which were glistening with pearls of sweat. How did Naruto look like that after the amount of ramen he ate every single day? Sasuke briefly thought.

He tried to reach up and touch the blond, only to find that he couldn't move his arms at all. Puzzled he looked up to see that obnoxious belt of his laughing at him, well thats what he thought anyway, and refusing to budge. He was about to growl at Naruto, but before he had the chance, Naruto had reached back down to the waistband of his boxers, and had succeeded in whipping them off without Sasuke noticing at all. (Well, until the cold blast of air that assaulted him made him gasp in surprise.) Sasuke felt a blush creep up his neck as he felt Naruto staring at his lively "package."

Naruto couldn't help but stare, Sasuke was...big to say the least. Naruto felt relief that he wasn't the uke, (at least not this time, there would definitely be others.) He looked to the embarrassed raven beneath him, and with an impatient grunt and slight incline of the head from him giving the blond the all clear, he continued his previous administrations, coming ever closer to Uchiha's hardened member, until he could swear he felt the shudders Sasuke was giving off, before flicking out his tongue and lightly tapping the sensitive tip causing the shocked raven to moan in want, effectively making Naruto feel even hotter and more uncomfortable in his loins. He needed to get rid of his pants A.S.A.P. He thought about teasing again but decided against it and all but ripped them off in a sudden blur of movement, leaving him in his boxers, he'd get rid of them later, but back to the attention lusting 'lower teme' , The blond descended for a second time, but this time took in the whole of his head and began to suck gently.

Naruto was taken a little off guard when Sasuke bucked up, nearly making him choke, he was glad that the belt was partially pinning him down or he might have gagged, but vigilantly continued, taking more of Sasuke in and getting rougher as the one below him's breath became more ragged between the cries of pleasure he was still emitting.

Sasuke was in pure bliss, where the heck did Naruto learn all this??!, He felt his stomach beginning to tighten, and seemingly hearing his thoughts, Naruto gave one long, hard suck and that was the end for Sasuke. A huge wave of euphoria crashed down on him as he released inside of the awaiting blond's mouth with a scream of pleasure. He had just gotten his breathing to be more regular, when he saw how uncomfortable Naruto looked, and he knew what he had to do. Without waisting time he slowly turned himself over, twisting the belt as he went, and nudged the blond with his foot as well as he could in his current position, looking to see startling blue eyes full of new emotions and poorly hidden lust hesitating to move "Naruto, what are you waiting for?"

Naruto was startled by the readiness in Sasuke's eyes, but still felt uncertain. "Well I don't want to force you, teme, only if you're sure..."

"Of course i'm sure usuratonkachi, now hurry the hell up, I've only got five minutes till my shift finishes. Or is your body suddenly as slow as your brain?" taunted the raven in the knowledge that it would spur him on, which naturally it did.

"Stupid Sas-UKE, luckily for you I keep a bottle of lube in my shoe at all times, just in case," snorted Naruto. Sasuke blinked at that statement, what kind of idiot keeps THAT in their shoes, oh wait, Naruto of course.

"Fine, dobe, just get it, and it better not smell of ramen, or that sofa I talked about earlier will be coming back from the carpenters for Round Two." And with that Naruto swiftly grabbed the small bottle, which lucky wasn't ramen (ramen was sold out) and hastily pulled down his own boxers, before he forgot, and began to slick his fingers with the lotion, before placing one at Sasuke's entrance, receiving only a grunt, he pushed the finger in and began stretching the Uchiha, before adding another, all the while kissing around Sasuke's neck to distract him from the uncomfortable painful feeling, and finally the third. Receiving a growl of pain from below, Naruto hesitated a little, but Sasuke commanded him to continue until he found a certain special spot making the raven gasp in a new form of pleasure, spurring Naruto on to keep it up until he felt it was time. Naruto removed his fingers and positioned himself, slowly entering into Sasuke, moaning as the heat engulfed him but keeping his restraint.

Sasuke was still growling at the larger intruding object but bit his lip and clenched his fists and urged Naruto on wards. "Hurry the hell up Naruto, we haven't got time to waste, and NO buts," he commanded through clenched teeth. Naruto actually listened as he fully entered Sasuke and let him get used to the feeling, before pulling nearly all the way out and sliding back in. Groaning , Naruto began to pick up the pace, and upon hearing Sasuke scream, he knew he must have hit the spot again. Angling himself correctly, Naruto slammed into the raven, letting a cry mingle with Sasuke's as he continued to repeat that action, picking up the pace again, until they were both screaming each others names. Naruto reached round and began stroking Sasuke until finally he released into his hand with another cry, causing him to tighten around Naruto and making the blond release as well.

They both collapsed panting, and still riding pleasure waves. They didn't notice a rather annoyed store manager watching the whole scene whilst muttering "that's coming out of the Uchiha's paycheck."

END


End file.
